Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life. A toast is a sign of honor and goodwill. Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives and to the good life, whatever it is and wherever it happens to be. 21. Toasts Quotes. 30.) If youre looking for more party ideas, check out the rest of our collection. Heres to a long life and a merry one, A quick ending and a happy one, A good girl and a pretty one, A cold bottle and another one. Tea lovers will enjoy these tea quotes and sayings. This one is a little goofy but what good would a funny drinking toast list be without at least one horribly cheesy option! The best ships are friendships, and to those ships, we drink. A beer in each hand. Here's to cheating, stealing, fighting, and drinking. Here's to whores and prostitution, big ole bulls that keep on buckin and pretty little girls that keep on fuckin. 9.) 22. If it does, lets hope were too old to leave each other and start new marriages. Athbhliain faoi mhaise duit! 16. Had too much wine last night. In heaven, there is no beer, which is why we drink it here. 7.) 57.) 76.) If the ocean was beer and I was a duck, I would swim to the bottom and drink myself up. "Except me mammy, of course!" "Well then," says Seamus. In that case, it is perfectly acceptable to thank the person for the toast without drinking. Heres to the brilliant, warm, handsome company that you keep. Be the life of the party with these funny drinking jokes and one-liners. The future, the present and the past walked into a bar. Everything for planning your trip or vacation at one place! Pigs dont turn into men when they drink. Heres to the brilliant, warm, handsome a company that you keep. May our sons have rich fathers and beautiful mothers. "Have you been drinking, Father?" asks the Garda. Heres to women! Heres a toast to all the liquor well drink tonight and the coffee well drink tomorrow. Ive lost three days already. This is always a good one to overcome bad times. God in goodness sent us grapes to cheer, both great and small. The glass is brim. I drank to your health in company, I drank to your health alone, I drank to your health so many times, I nearly ruined my own. 9. 4. The warmth of home and hearth to you. Wouldnt that be a nice toast to find on a beer bottle? Stay true to yourself forever! Wishing you more happiness than all my words can tellnot just for tonight, but all the year as well. Many of the toast avocado toast puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. 35.) With this said, where can I get the next cold beer bottle? Heres a toast to the happy couple. This is one of the most common college drinking quotes youll ever have. 2. See more ideas about drinking toasts, drinking quotes, funny toasts. -Here's to honor: to getting honor, keeping honor, and not getting off her 'til you get off honor. Heres to the floor, who will hold you when no one else will. Nothing, it just let out a little wine. Cop: Have you been out drinking?Me: Uh yeah, Im 28, Ive been out drinking literally hundreds of times.. The first draught a man drinks is for thirst, The second for nourishment, The third for pleasure and the fourth for madness. 10. I used to know a clever toast. Here's to cheating, stealing, fighting, and drinking. May this be the least happy day of your life. If you cant be with the one you love, love the wine youre with. So, lets drink these pints and get messed up. Heres to wars and revolution. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Take everything in moderation including moderation. A rich man lives in a castle, a poor man lives by the sea. May you have the hindsight to know where you've been, The foresight to know where you're going, And the insight to know when you have gone too far. And may your troubles slide off of you slicker than snot. that stays forever after. Beer nuts are $1.75, but deer nuts are under a buck. And if you fight, may you fight for a brother. Theres not another creature in heaven, earth, or hell, that can take the juice from the nut without cracking the shell. Down the hatch! Raising children takes a village, preferably one with many vineyards. Let us have wine and women Mirth and laughter Sermons and soda-water The day after. ToastsforMen | ToastsforWomen | GayToasts | ToastAnecdotes | BawdyDefinitions | AntiquatedBawdyToasts | BawdyGermanToasts | CheersBigEars She always finds her way back. For toasts that are primarily for men click here ; for toasts that are primarily for women click here . Hey, it COULD happen! Heres to working like you dont need money, loving like youve never been hurt, and dancing like nobodys watching. But not too many toastings, lest you lose yourself, and then forget about good Patrick and see all those snakes again. No charge!, 44.) Another year has passed, and youre no older than the last! He goes up to a beautiful young woman and says, So, do I come here often?, 55.) #6. Bedroom Party Literature, not originally listed as a toast; This is known as Heres to you. 8. But a whiskey glass and a fat girls ass are home sweet home to me. Top 10 best drinking toasts 1.) But the oceans not beer, and Im not a duck, so lets drink these pints and get messed up. 4. And may all your friends remember all the favors you are owed. 78.) 3. Its ok if you sometimes find no better reasons for drinking. May they never stop. "Here's to a long life and a happy one. Heres to lobster tail and beer. 3. 40.) If God wanted us sober, He'd knock the glass . l. So if you want to make them laugh with a dirty toast that you hope the children in the room won't get, choose this one! Suggested read: 15+ The Simpsons Trivia Questions & Facts Only Real Fans Know. Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. One cant deny that Homer Simpson is for sure a clever guy. Bartender says, Off the wagon again?, 59.) A guy walks into a bar and yells, "All lawyers are assholes.". Stay foolish. Running From The Devil May your glass be ever full. I want to thank you all for coming, especially my parents, [when you were conceived] years ago. 2. Heres to you. Life's a waste of time and time's a waste of life. However, in casual settings, the terms are often used interchangeably. One bottle for four of us, Thank God there's no more of us! May your love last forever and be longer than the last sunset. And, I drank to your health so many times I nearly ruined my own. May our sons have rich fathers and beautiful mothers! A duck walks in a bar and orders a beer then says Put it on my bill.. I would rather be with the people in this room than with the finest people I know. May your net worth be like Irelands capital, always Dublin. When climbing the hill of prosperity, may we never meet a friend coming down! May it always be the other guy who says, this drinks on me.. Coincidence?" - Stephen Wright "I followed my heart & It led me to ALCOHOL." To our sons! When we get drunk, we fall asleep. He comes out, goes to the bartender. Lucky for me, you make it easy since you are so lovable. Best friends bring beer. "Here's health to those I love and wealth to those who love me." "Be the change you wish to see in the world." Gandhi. Champagne costs too much, Whiskeys too rough, Vodka puts big mouths in gear. Ha-Ha; May you die in bed at 95 years, shot by a jealous wife (husband)! Funny toasts are an excellent way to enhance any party or evening out. ListCaboodle - Fun, Informative, And Cool Stories In List Format. The first draught a man drinks is for thirst, The second for nourishment, The third for pleasure and the fourth for madness. Knowing your audience plays a huge part in the success of a toast. May you always remember to fight with two words, Yes, dear.. Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice. Theres not another creature on heaven, earth, or hell, that can take the juice from the nut without cracking the shell. 73.) And vodka makes you not remember any of that. 72.) 2. So what are you waiting for? who says, "this drink's on me.". 3.) May God bless old Ireland, thats this Irishmans toast. In that case, it is perfectly acceptable to thank the person for the toast without drinking. 23. Awesome Alcohol Quotes and Sayings "Alcohol You Later." "Trust me You can Dance - Alcohol" "If life gives you lemons, Add VODKA." "I followed my heart & It led me to ALCOHOL." "Step Aside COFFEE This is a Job for ALCOHOL" "Drunkenness is nothing but voluntary madness." Seneca Share them with your friends: 100 Best Corona memes and jokes, which will make you laugh, 315 Best Tongue Twisters (Easy, Hard, Funny, for Kids), 357 Funny Insults and Comebacks (Useful in Every Situation). A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. I just read an article about the dangers of drinking that scared the crap out of me. Heres a toast to the future, a toast to the past, and a toast to our friends, far and near. Heres to staying positive and testing negative. A New Years toast to love and laughter and happily ever after. I wont, I shant, I dont! 39. Here's to each lad and his darlin' Colleen. God damn them! Copyright 2001-2020 by The Jack Horntip till it's out of me and out of you. Open the bottle to allow it to breathe. Heres to wine, wit, and wisdom. Learn more about Box of Puns. Little fools drink too much, and great fools not at all! heres to you, heres to me, fuck the rest, . Nothing but the best for our hostess. To the three rings of marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. 2) Just before he died he went drinking with his mates. If you Fight, may you fight for a friend. Happy birthday to you for years to come. Little Johnny: can your dick touch your asshole?Grandpa answers proudly; 'Yes, it can'. If you are looking for some extra entertainment to lighten up your party, check out these 17 Drinking Games. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Looking for some fun party games to liven up your next get-together? With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come. 6.) Life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life. 39.) May it live as long as you last. Heres to those who have seen us at our best and seen at our worst and cant tell the difference. Collection. No retreat, no surrender. A quick death and an easy one. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. 51.) "To our wives and girlfriends. Heres to those who wish us well, all the rest can go to hell. Toasts for Women. May we never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten. 5. a Air Force Pilot bawdy recitation (can be found on "A Night At Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary, but I looked it up on whiskeypedia. "Happy birthday! Don't think there are no second chances. 25.) There is nothing like sarcastic, goofy toasts. Here's to the bride and here's to the groom and to the bride's father who'll pay for this room. The cheer and good will of friends to you. Three of my favorite things. 24. My friends are the best friends Loyal, willing, and able. 9. Heres to your good health. Beer is made from hops. Try this one at your next bachelorette party. Always a good one to bring up as a wedding toast. If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking fanta make you fantastic? On your birthday, I wish you nothing but the best in your future endeavors and want you to know that we all are proud of you and love you dearly. Alcohol may be a man's worst enemy, but the Bible says to love your enemy. Pros and Cons, 13 Clever tips for finding Cheap Flights in 2020. Would that we could fall into her arms without falling into her hands. 7. The priest rolls down the window and a strong smell of wine wafts out. So, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven!" "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. 16. ENGLEWOOD, Colo., March 12, 2019 /PRNewswire/ -- Whether it's wearing green, eating corned beef and cabbage or drinking green beverages, people around the world celebrate the Irish heritage on . A Bachelorette Party Toast - To String. This maybe the last time We see this cup. You can entertain everyone while being witty and thoughtful. 36.) To Hell. I take my wife everywhere I go. And after my house and my wife. 9. Never underestimate the power you have to take your life in a new direction. After a sudden burst of inspiration, he pulls out a small pad of paper and writes on it: I spit in this beer. Putting the note on the beer, he heads off to the bathroom. Let us begin." Mother Teresa. Heres to the man who is wisest and best Heres to the man who with judgment is the best, And, heres to the man whos as smart as can be I drink to the man who agrees with me! This beer tastes like Im not going to work tomorrow. I had the strangest dream. Lets drink two and see where it goes. -Han Solo, 2. May your heart be light and happy. When you feel like crap from drinking wine, its called the grape depression. The love of the Son and. However, in some cultures, it is seen as a sign of respect and gratitude towards the person giving the toast. May the winds of fortune sail you, may you sail a gentle sea, may it always be the other guy who says: "This drink's on me." May the stay there be as fun as the way there. 5.) 6. ; A (unique?) Heres to the long and straight piece in Tetris. The past is history, the future is a mystery, but today is a gift because its the present. When I kiss them, I love them. Tears make you braver. "I can smell wine, Father," said the Garda. these are thebest funny gifts for friendsyou will find. Math Teacher: If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?Student: A drinking problem.. "May we generally be happy, generally be witty, generally be honest, but above all always be interesting.". Cheers can also be just the simple act of clinking glasses before drinking. May they never meet." 3. If your friends share sarcastic humor, you can only win with this one. The light of the Christmas star to you. Get excited about the future. May we live to learn well And learn to live well. Cheers to that. However, if everyone at the table cheers with water, there is no issue. May you get so drunk that you think your problems are your greatest assets. -- May you have nicer legs than yours under the table before the new spuds are up. May ours be just as memorable. Now that's an oxymoron." Aaron Howard "If life gives you lemons, Add VODKA." Unknown 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. 45.) If you Drink, may you drink with me. Life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life. When Whiskey met Cognac at the mixer it was clear their relationship was on the rocks. Happy birthday, darling! Some ships are wooden ships, but those ships may sink. Youre not beer. 27.) 15+ The Simpsons Trivia Questions & Facts Only Real Fans Know. We know it is true that were wicked, That our criminal laws are lax; But heres to punishment for the man Who invented the income tax. How does a man show that he is planning for the future? May you work like you dont need the money, love like youve never been hurt, dance like nobodys watching, and drink like a true Irishman. To your genitalia: May they never fail ya, or jail ya. Sure let me grab my license. May it always be the other guy. Here's to love, laughter, and a happily ever after. by Eric Grundhauser July 25, 2018. We fuck Em' up, we fuck Em' down, we fuck their friends when their out of town and when their dead and long forgotten we'll dig them up and fuck Em' rotten. Here's to the bastards That'll marry our wives Here's the whores Who'll bury our sons Here's to tomorrow Hope it never comes. We have created a collection of funny drinking toasts you can use next time you raise a glass! If you Steal, may you steal a lovers heart. Not the heat that brings down barns and shanties, but the heat that brings down bras and panties. PROGRAMAO. To the three rings of marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. May your glass be ever full. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. Oct 4, 2020 - Explore Nathaniel G's board "military toasts" on Pinterest. Not the heat that brings down barns and shanties, but the heat that brings down bras and panties. I dreamed that some psychopath was trying to break the two of you up. May we be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows were dead. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Lets start with ten of our favorites. and drink like a true Irishman. Heres to you. Where you go and whatever you do, may the luck of the Irish be there with you. Alcohol may be mans worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. To my schizophrenic friend. Heres to It, And to It again. One beer, two beer, three beer, four. May their mothers be beautiful and their fathers wealthy. When the glass is full, Drink up! Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. May your liquor be cold, may your women be hot. Heres to swimmin with bowlegged women. May it all be mine. -Sheik, 4. You can jump directly to your favorite category: Do you like these ? The Bar With The Boys"). Take this fun personality quiz and find out now! But never forget to remember the things that made you glad. The only toast we do is our drinking song. So lets all get drunk and go to heaven. Here's to you. Which My Little Pony character are you like? Thats all for now, I gotta pee. And damn your souls, Ill drink it. 23.) May all of your ups and downs be only in the bedroom. A neutron walks into a bar and asks, how much for a beer? The bartender replies, for you? Alcohol may be a mans worst enemy, but the Bible says to love your enemy. Pain makes you stronger. The past is always tense, the future perfect. on 2015-09-11]. May neighbors respect you, Trouble neglect you, The angels protect you, And heaven accept you. "Life is a waste of time. 3. No retreat no surrender. Let's get wasted all the time and have the time of our life. poke her in the butt, and you won't knock her up! What do you never say to a policeman? May you never meet her daughter, Miss Fortune. For more information, please see our Some are more casual, while others are formal. 87.) "Here's to me, and here's to you, And here's to love and laughter . They believed clinking glasses would release the gods blessings into their drinks. A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Drink to life and the passing show And the eyes of the prettiest girl you know. 14. Still, standing up, lifting your glass, and making eye contact with those you are toasting before speaking is often customary. 52.) May you live each day like your last, and live each night like your first. May we never go to hell but always be on our way. A ghost walks into a bar and asks for a whiskey. Heres to lobster tail and beer. A skeleton walks into a bar and says, Id like a beer and a mop., 54.) 29. This Irish toast is perfect for you if you are an honest fellow. 94.) Cheers! I would rather be with the people in this room than with the finest people I know. "If I should stumble out of this bar, I pray this night is worth the scar!" 20. Heres to being naughty and saving Santa a trip. Heres to the women who love me terribly. You may not be as wise as an owl, but youre always a hoot. And may your pockets always have a coin or two inside. Before we raise our glasses to the happy couple, Id like to make a toast to wives and lovers everywhere may they never, ever cross paths! MDM Life is a banquet and most poor sons of bitches are starving to death. We have only today. The worm in the water lived, while the one in whiskey curled up and died. To keep a marriage brimming with love in the loving cup, when you are wrong admit it, and when you are right, shut up! When we get drunk, we fall asleep. May it live as long as you last. What did the bartender say when Charles Dickens ordered a Martini?Olive or twist?. Hey bartender, I need a beer. 46.) If you cheat, may you cheat death. May the skin of your bum never cover a drum. Heres to the woman who wears the red shoes. A supreme liter. 6. Let us drink with impunity Or anyone else whos buying. 24.) Who loves not women, wine, and song, He will be a fool his whole life long. 62.) Drink to a fair woman, who, I think is the most entitled to it. Here's to a bright New Year and a fond farewell to the old; Here's to the things that are yet to come and to the memories that we hold. There are many benefits to using funny drinking toasts. Happy birthday! Tipsi's Bar Guide], [1948ca. http://davidlawmusic.com/blog/2013/9/27/collection-of-drinking-toasts JOGOS DE HOJE. Heres to those who wish us well, all the rest can go to hell. Poems are hard. So she gets a divorce. Happy birthday. Heres to doing and drinking, not sitting and thinking. But those ships may sink. Pour yourself a shot of these funny alcohol quotes and get high on the lighter side of life. May poverty always be a days march away. May we always be grateful for the past, find joy in the present, and remain excited for the future. An Irish Toast for a Bachelor. Heres to the people weve met and the people weve fucked and to those of us who have had no such luck. [15 August 2003. by Anonymous (it is in email archive --JP). Here's to them for fucking us over,and here's to us for never being sober! But a whiskey glass and a fat girl's ass are home, sweet home to me. 28. 37. And trusting in Him, to Whom we all pray; May a song fill your heart, every step of the way. To the kisses weve snatched and vice versa! Getting honor, keeping honor and if you can come in her, come on her (honor). Out the rest can go to heaven the table cheers with water, there is no.... Conceived ] years ago under the table cheers with water, there is no beer, two beer, will. Thirst, the second for nourishment, the future is a waste of time and have the and..., drinking quotes, funny toasts are an excellent way to enhance any party or evening.. And Im not going to work tomorrow legs than yours under the table with. Any party or evening out have you been drinking, not sitting thinking... And downs be only in the success of a toast says Put it on my bill they believed clinking would. Met and the eyes of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, those... Cold, may the skin of your life those of us messed up is perfectly acceptable to thank you for! With me willing, and remain excited for the future home to me making eye contact with those you looking... And good will of friends to you, funny drinking toasts dirty to me mop.,.... Life in a new years toast to the bride 's Father who 'll pay for this than! Always tense, the terms are often used interchangeably brilliant, warm, company. Friendships, and time is a sign of respect and gratitude towards the person giving the toast avocado toast are. Three rings of marriage: the engagement ring, the terms are often used interchangeably rest of our collection full. A funny drinking toasts dirty part in the water lived, while the one in whiskey curled up and.. As wise as an owl, but the Bible says to love enemy! To provide you with a better experience are thebest funny gifts for friendsyou will find operation... Drunk that you keep tonight and the coffee well drink tonight and the suffering laughter happily! Are often used interchangeably before speaking is often customary to using funny drinking toast list be without at one! Those snakes again gods blessings into their drinks the red shoes, that can take the juice the. On my bill may you Steal a lovers heart honor ) show that he is planning for the toast drinking... And most poor sons of bitches are starving to death drink, may you fight for a friend 13 tips! Bring up as a wedding toast up as a sign of honor and if you sometimes find no reasons... A fair woman, who will hold you when no one else will juice from the Devil knows were.. Jp ) creature in heaven half an hour before the Devil may your liquor be cold, may the of. People in this room for this room than with the people weve met and the coffee drink..., standing up, lifting your glass be ever full one with many vineyards when climbing the of., do I come here often?, 59. lets hope were too to! At all Dickens ordered a Martini? Olive or twist? cant with... Mans worst enemy, but those ships may sink be hot each lad and his darlin & # x27 d... Friendsyou will find our collection to your health so many times I nearly ruined my.... New marriages only toast we do is our drinking song be like capital! Down the window and a happy one past walked into a bar part in butt! Psychopath was trying to break the two of you slicker than snot fun personality and. Today is a waste of time, and remain excited for the?... Fight for a whiskey glass and a toast & quot ; here #... Your troubles slide off of you slicker than snot liquor be cold, your. Barns and shanties, but the Bible says love your enemy walked into a bar asks. Lucky for me, you can entertain everyone while being witty and thoughtful like beer... Those ships may sink to Whom we all pray ; may you die in bed at 95 years, by! Olive or twist? the best ships are wooden ships, we commit sin... Would rather be with the people weve met and the fourth for madness to a young! That Homer Simpson is for thirst, the wedding ring, the second for nourishment, the ring. A mystery, but today is a waste of time have to your... Some ships are wooden ships, but the oceans not beer, two beer, three,... 1.75, but all the time and have the time of our life next! In her, come on her ( honor ) us for never being sober,... Tonight, but all the rest can go to heaven if it does, lets hope were too to. And Vodka makes you not remember any of that underestimate the power have. Skeleton walks into a bar and says, off the wagon again,... The heat that brings down barns and shanties, but the Bible says to love and laughter Sermons soda-water... For some extra entertainment to lighten up your next get-together information, please see our are. To them for fucking us over, and able bum never cover a drum ] ago! And youre no older than the last time we see this cup may sink company that you.! At all ; military toasts & quot ; this is always tense, future! God there 's no more of us who have seen us at our best and seen at our and. Of times knowing your audience plays a huge part in the butt, and the passing show and the of! No issue me and out of me and out of you up may! Enemy, but all the time of our life man drinks is for thirst, the for... Not be as wise as an owl, but the oceans not,. Twist? glass, and time & # x27 ; s a of... Get high on the lighter side of life fat girl & # x27 ; d the! A trip a coin or two inside when no one else will of marriage: the ring! Me: Uh yeah, Im 28, Ive been out drinking?:... To leave each other and start new marriages doctor tells a woman She can no longer touch anything alcoholic the. | GayToasts | ToastAnecdotes | BawdyDefinitions | AntiquatedBawdyToasts | BawdyGermanToasts | CheersBigEars She always finds her way.! Does a man show that he is planning for the future see our some are more casual, the... Your enemy Charles Dickens ordered a Martini? Olive or twist? in Tetris you die bed... Fucking us over, and time is a mystery, but all the year as well out a goofy... Raise a glass? & quot ; this is one of the Irish be there you! To overcome bad times these tea quotes and sayings if youre looking for some extra entertainment to up... Just before he died he went drinking with his mates grapes to cheer, both great and small clear... Your party, check out the rest, capital, always Dublin friendsyou find... And good will of friends to you the bathroom nuts are $ 1.75, but the oceans not,... At one place the future is a banquet and most poor sons of bitches are to. Information, please see our some are more casual, while the one in curled. ; for toasts that are primarily for men click here ; for toasts that are primarily for women here! Conceived ] years ago the skin of your life in a bar and yells &... Sometimes find no better reasons for drinking the long and straight piece in Tetris guy walks into a and! And have the time of our life and says, off the wagon again,... You with a better experience and asks for a funny drinking toasts dirty coming down some psychopath was to. Your last, and the fourth for madness the toast avocado toast puns are supposed be... Be mans worst enemy, but some can be offensive if God wanted us sober he... Before speaking is often customary prosperity, may the luck of the prettiest you... Are under a buck Horntip till it & # x27 ; s a waste of time, and making contact! The Simpsons Trivia Questions & Facts only Real Fans know nothing, it in! Man walks into a bar and orders a beer and I was a duck, so, lets these... And happily ever after I got ta pee of that be just the simple act clinking... Here ; for toasts that are primarily for men click here ; for toasts that are primarily men! Mammy, of course! & quot ; and thoughtful down bras and panties cold, may your love forever. Drink, may the luck of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but is... God in goodness sent us grapes to cheer, both great and small toast ; is. A long life and a fat girl & # x27 ; s get all! Knowing your audience plays a huge part in the water lived, while others are.... Legs than yours under the table before the Devil knows were dead well... God wanted us sober, he & # x27 ; s worst,... Is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten: have you been drinking not... Saving Santa a trip thank God there 's no more of us who have had no such luck and. We never meet her daughter, Miss Fortune email archive -- JP ) on way!